I'll Get Back To You

Dear Cece,

Today, as I was running an errand I didn't want to do, for someone I don't really want to help, I was suddenly struck with the thought “What if I died in a car wreck while I was running this errand? That would be a real waste of my life!” So now I'm having an emotional crisis because life is full of doing things that aren't fun but you can't just quit doing them unless you want to live in a box under a bridge and that's no fun either, right? What's your advice for me?

- Just the Errand Girl

Dear Girl,

I think you already know my answer but here it is, short and sweet. You need to start setting healthy boundaries and making more strategic decisions because there is a lot more going on here than just a random errand that made you question the worth of your life (don't worry I will help you).

Now back to the the details:

Obviously, the ideal situation when asked to do something for others is to be able to say an honest “yes” or “no” immediately, based on your current priorities and resources. If that isn't possible, I invite you to start practicing this phrase: “I'll get back to you”. Say it with me (smile kindly)... “I'll get back to you.”

Now, when someone asks you to do a task for them, say those magic words and leave their presence even if only for 1 minute (bonus list of excuses at the bottom of this page). Find a moment to suss out if this task is important and actionable for you (we can talk more about priorities later, but you'll already have a gut instinct here – use it) or could be delegated to someone else who would appreciate it more.

Don't feel guilty if you decide it's the latter. I believe that we each have a specific purpose on this Earth, that's why we all have unique abilities, desires and preferences. What you leave undone is an opportunity for someone who wants to do it. I know that sounds a little flaky, but companies like Task Rabbit*, Fancy hands* and your local handyman are perfect examples of how true it is.

Back to your profound errand experience, I think examining your revelation of what constitutes a waste of life is a bigger undertaking than I can address here, so call me and we'll get started privately, if you'd like.

I hope this first simple step of allowing yourself to take a beat before committing to anything more in life will move you toward a better use of your unique gifts and set your mind at ease about how you're spending your life, my dear!

Please let me know how it goes!

Lots of love,

Cece

P.S. Here's your quick list of truthful, buy time fast excuses:

I have to go powder my nose/use the restroom

Let me check my schedule to see if I can do it

I have to make a call/send a message later and see if I can fit it in

I have to check with _(person)_ because I promised them my time that day

I would like to talk to you more about that later, right now I have to __(insert activity or meeting you are on your way to do)__.

*No affiliation or endorsement, just pertinent examples