When you're being most difficult is when you need most to be loved

You know how sometimes it feels like you're going through your own personal version of hell? Honestly, are you nice to people? Is your first instinct to go out and be generous and helpful? For most of us, that is a big N.O.

We contract into a grumpy, petty little hurt animal that often lashes out at anyone approaching just because our critter brain is in survival mode and any perceived threat or distraction must be obliterated. Yes?

Sometimes we are lucky enough to have someone who loves us even though we lash out at them. They persevere and hold our hand saying, “I'm here for you. You're not alone.”

It means more than anything, when we are blinded by sadness, anger and fear to know someone has our back even though we're miserable to be around.

Is there anyone in your life right now who is being really difficult? Sometimes it's so bad that everyone backs away, unwilling to suffer any unwarranted injury. We “establish healthy boundaries” with them because their pain scares us or we aren't able to cope with the situation.

But, when someone is hurting so much that all they can do is dish out their pain, that's the time they need to be loved the most. Somehow, their situation has completely depleted their stores of love so that there's none left for them to draw on and yes, it's our job to fill one another's love reserves back up, even if it's hard. Especially when it's hard!

I hope you'll take a few minutes this week to be compassionate to people who are angry, hurting or having a really hard time and let them know they aren't alone. Give them a little love boost. It can be as easy as letting them tell you their story and knowing you hear them.

If it makes you more comfortable to do it anonymously, ok, but I'd like to invite you to own it – there's something really valuable to knowing someone is intentionally there for you rather than a roll of the cosmic dice happened to land on your number that day.

We all need our hand held some days.