You didn't waste your time, you make things better

We have all had times where we are closing out a part of our life. It might be a relationship ending or leaving a job, and we look back at it and think "What a waste, I'll never get that part of my life back." and it feels really awful. What I'd like to offer you today is a different perspective on it. No matter how wasteful it feels and how much we regret we hold, we have to know that it wasn't all in vain because we left the world a little better and that is what counts (what I mean is, it's not always all about you!).

For example, I have conversations often with people who regret an old relationship because it seems like their ex married the very next person they dated and they wonder why it couldn't have been them. To that I say, remind yourself of all the things that weren't working. Write them down and refer to the list often, if you have to. Then, realize that the time you spent with that person made them more marketable and able to make someone else happy enough to marry them! You did their new partner a huge favor, the kind of favor you wish someone else would do for you and we all know, what goes around comes around.

Another great example is when we are leaving a job. If you're choosing to leave or have been let go, chances are there's a lot of negativity around that termination and you feel like you wasted your time and efforts and you probably feel like they didn't value you like they should have. I'm not saying it isn't true, but it will help you get on with life a lot faster if you think of the ways you left that job better. Even if in your last moments there you left things an utter mess and tried to sabotage everything you could, chances are your employer will think the next person is a rock star when they clean it all up. You will have successfully given someone else temporary job security and self esteem to boot. Alternately, if you were conscientious and left the job in good shape, then the next person coming in will have an easy transition and appreciate how you made their life easier. I've been in both positions and I can tell you that from experience!

At the end of the day, you always know that things aren't what they appear and bad situations are definitely opportunities for positive growth in the world and you help make that happen!